We parked the car, and paid less for 2 hours than I do for 1 hour at Brock for class, and stumbled immediately upon a quaint little book shop. It had a you-don't-belong-here-you-bohemian-clumsy-pothead air about it. I feared touching anything.
They had some amusing shop names. Like....Liquor Store....and The Owl and the Pussycat. Hehee. El pussycato.
We went into The Name Tree, and politely asked the woman inside if we could pose with her armour! She politely allowed us to.
Caution! Art ahead.
Here...is a map. I took an extra photo of the Niagara Parkway. It's my cruise route. I love the parkway. The American side sucks though. We totally got the good side. We rock.
So check it out: there is a store just for Christmas swag. Just Christmas swag! All year 'round! Even in the summertime! Wtf?!
We then happened upon none other than the Beau Chapeau. Their hats weren't all that nice, actually. Some really fucked up New York funeral hats that Niagara-Fallsians could never get away with in a million years.
They had some good advice for the kids though:
Remember, girls: If you forget your hat, you can always flirt with your cigarette.
Okay, let us pause for a moment to observe the extent to which we have made fruit unhealthy. Below, are candy apples. Apples. Dipped in chocolate, and covered in - wait for it - fucking oreo cookies. How the hell are you even supposed to eat that?! You need to break off and consume ten oreo cookies before you even get to the thick chocolate layer surrounding what was once a nice healthy apple. My god, people! Just drink a jug of lard, why don't you.
We moved on from the oreo-cookie-fat-depository window to a store that has a lot of trees in front of it. Those trees had a lot of wind chimes on them. It was a fairly breezy day. The sound was....kinda pretty, actually. I like the sunflower, the bee, and the newt. So cute!! My goodness.
Once we entered wind-chimesville, we found some darling little mice statues. A boy and a girl!! The boy had a bowtie. The girl had a flower in her...hair...fur. You know, to differentiate mouse genders.
Beside the wind chime store, we found The Viking Shop, and the most fantastic umbrella handles ever. The orange umbrella had a little goldfishy floating in the handle! The yellow one had a little rubber ducky! The green one had a frog. Not a fan frog though. There was a blue one with a dolphin, but I'm not a fan of dolphins either. They remind me of a girl that lived down the street when I was a kid who used to go home to eat dinner and somehow get sauce on her forehead for us to look at upon her return. Bloody dolphins...
The restaurant, The Epicurean, gets photo props for their slogan: Purveyors & Servers of Fine Foods. Classy. Very classy.
Around this point I decided time was ripe for some statue humping. So I humped a statue. I'm not sure who it is...but I'm sure he's impressed that I'm humping his likeness. I wouldn't mind people humping my likeness some day.
On a side street, slightly beyond the statue, we found an awesome little store called The Silver Screen. They specialized in old movies, tin signs, and general awesome. I found The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari!! I didn't buy it though. I'm too poor for a $20.00+ dvd that I can just put on my Christmas list. Instead I bought a $4.00 Batman tin within which I might store my illicit materials. We did pose in front of a cute little Betty Boop statue. After that photo op, we noticed the sign that told us DO NOT TOUCH!!! Ah well, c'est la vie.
We cross the street after that. We were running out of time. I had to pick up my boy at work for 4:30 in Thorold. It's a ways away, drive-wise. We happened upon the post office. There's been a lot of controversy regarding it, as it isn't keeping with the towns quaint aesthetic. Fuck you, post office, what with your new bricks and such.
Along to happy! A teensy little store called Cute, the self-proclaimed home of the best darn pant hanger on the planet! We never saw it...we did see ourselves posing all cute in front of Cute though. On my camera. In playback mode. Aaw!
A little further down, a wonderfully bright hammock caught Elysia's eye in Ten Thousand Villages. The hammock was pretty sweet (and pretty expensive), but it was the brown bag sporting the descriptive words of "Brown Bag" on it that caught my eye. What an awesome bag.
At this point, we ended up running back to the car and speeding to Thorold to get there for 4:30pm, but not before making some memories and taking some pictures. Oh, life, how we love thee! This is Sabu, signing off.
No comments:
Post a Comment